Posted in Christianity, Inspiration, Loss, Photography, The Beauty of Creation, Trials & Blessings

The Unfulfilled Rose – Sadness as Blossoms Fall and Lie in Falling Tears

A little something I wrote six years ago:-

Shattered in the Rain Over the last week or so, I have been peering out of our bay window on waking, to see my beautiful ‘English Rose’ blossoming before my very eyes and being in awe, once again, of the perfect work of my Lord and Saviour. This is one of two David Austin roses that I recently bought and I was so excited to see the finished rose.

Shattered in the Rain 2We’ve been having soft; but steady rain for quite a while now and the rose continued to break forth and grasp as much sunlight as possible.

Shattered in the Rain 3Words cannot describe this gorgeous bloom laced with scent from heaven.

Shattered in the Rain 4Sadly, the rain was bruising the underside (sorry I’m not technical in botanical terms).

Shattered in the Rain 5But each morning brought with it another stunning image.

Shattered in the Rain 6Really starting to open up now. I’m in love.

Shattered in the Rain 7So many petals on one sweet flower and the colour, divine.

Shattered in the Rain 8But the rain was taking its toll on the dear, little one.

Shattered in the Rain 9And this morning I awoke to a broken sight.

Shattered in the Rain 10My heart broke. Perfection, beauty lay fallen upon the ground.

Shattered in the Rain 11The creaminess had become a soft shade of lemon. Crushed. Compacted in pain.

Shattered in the Rain 13This is all that remains. Remnants of torn petals for which I feel much sadness and yes, guilt.

Shattered in the Rain 14For you see, a few days ago, I took the damaged petals from the rose. I had to tear them off. I feel that I have in some way contributed to the rose’s demise. It was unable to hold all of heaven’s tears and unable to take it any longer, it just gave up and surrendered to what it knew it couldn’t control.

I had even written a poem :-

“Such a silly thing I did today

I tried to take imperfection away

I prayed the Lord, He wouldn’t take

The beauty of the rose at stake”

But by tearing away what I thought was something that was marring its beauty, was in reality actually holding it’s very existence together.

Yes, I know there will be some of you that think I am totally exaggerating; but I see amazing stories and spiritual truths in God’s creation and being able to capture them with the camera is a blessing.

We grow stronger with our trials. With pain. With tears. With anything that makes us feel like we can’t go on.

Jesus is the only One who can hold us together.

Tearing Him from our lives is devastating.

Maybe not now.

But one day.

God bless all who read this.

Posted in Christianity, Hope, Inspiration, Promise, The Beauty of Creation

BENEATH THE SILENT WAVES

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Beneath the silent waves
Of yonder distant hill
The wildness of the breeze
Cries listen, and be still

The echoes of new life
Fragrance softly falling
The melody of song
Reveal God, all knowing

Each breath breathes a heartbeat
An emptiness within
A breath captivated
Delivered from its sin

O Taste and see, the Lord
Is good, so many signs
And wonders, all around
Through darkness, He still shines

Beneath those silent waves
Can you hear Him calling
Through waves of circumstance
Trials bring you home, glowing

© 2019 Liana Wendy Howarth

Posted in Christianity, Inspiration, Love, The Beauty of Creation, Trials & Blessings

WALKING WITH MY LOVE

flower

Through the dew I see Your face
It reflects the morning sun
The flowers dance
A new romance
And will till the day is done

With each new beckoning light
I’m drawn into the garden
You call my name
My heart’s aflame
With sweet love, and Your pardon

We sit awhile, hand in hand
All burdens, they fly away
Exchanging smiles
Forgetting trials
For now, there’s no need to pray

Come with me, He softly says
I have something, just for you
His eyes glisten
As I listen
And eagerly stand anew

He leads the way, through the trees
I follow, silent behind
Closing my eyes
Sensing the prize
The aroma floods my mind

We’re here, come closer, He says
As loving arms bring me near
Open your heart
Then you will start
To know of My love, My dear

As I stand in awe of Him
I see the still pool glisten
He’s brought me life
Taken my strife
I’m mirroring God’s own Son

Yes, through the green, on to blue
He’s my Shepherd, through and through
Pastures verde
Waters, they see
Beauty’s lyrics, all things new

© 2019 Liana Wendy Howarth

Posted in Christianity, Inspiration, Songs, The Beauty of Creation

TEARS OF MERCY (Song Lyrics)

mirror effect

Looking in the mirror
Who is it that I see
Not always someone beautiful
Staring back at me

And I search for changes
Trying to find the joy
Make myself to smile, masking tears
They fall, drowning joy

Why is it difficult
To see me as You do
The image is so distorted
Please Lord, show me new

Let all the hidden pain
That’s etched so deep within
Rise to the surface, and be gone
Your child will then win

Chorus
Father, let Your tears of mercy cover mine
May they flow through the long-lost hurts, pain, and fears
Flow through valleys, bear much fruit upon the vine
Bringing life to replace my forgotten years
New life to replace all the joy quenching tears

Yes, this child will then win
I’ll see myself clearly
Clothed in Your perfect righteousness
And washed from my sin

I’ll look in the mirror
I’ll see Your reflection
Then I’ll finally see myself
Through Your salvation

My countenance will change
My face, it radiates
Seeing clearly for the first time
Just as Your Word states

That I am forgiven
In Christ I have it all
Through Father’s eyes of love, I see
Me, before the Fall

Chorus
Father, let Your tears of mercy cover mine
May they flow through the long-lost hurts, pain and fears
Flow through valleys, bear much fruit upon the vine
Bringing life to replace my forgotten years
Life to replace all of my forgotten years
New life to replace all the joy quenching tears

© 2019 Liana Wendy Howarth

Posted in Christianity, Hope, Loss, Love, The Beauty of Creation

I AM NOT A BLOB

ultrasound and belly

You didn’t know I was inside
So tiny at first, unseen
Then small changes started happening
And you’d never again be how you’d been

One minute you’d cry, then you’d laugh
Strange things, now so inviting
Beautiful glows appeared on your face
Sometimes the waves would keep you from eating

Please let me tell you a story
My little heart formed quickly
And within the space of a moment
I was becoming somebody, yes, me

And there are many dreams ahead
I’m more precious than a pearl
I love to twirl in this warm, dark lake
You don’t know yet, if I’m a boy, or girl

Every day I hear your heartbeat
Love compounding with each breath
Oh dear Mama, I feel so cherished
Oh dear Papa, you’ve given life, not death

I hear each word of spoken love
I feel so safe, and secure
With each passing day of my new growth
Your gentle lullabies, they reassure

Then one day, everything, it changed
Your tears no longer cried love
Voices vibrated longer, louder
I heard you didn’t want me, no more love

My heart started beating faster
There was nothing I could do
Can’t you see, feel I’m nearly ready
To be placed in your arms, so close to you

Please, please, can someone please help me
My lungs, ready for breathing
And ready to cry with thankfulness
I’m a perfectly formed human being

Mama, you said that you loved me
Your heart was no longer grey
That you’d always wanted a baby
No, don’t do that, take that needle away

I hurt so much Mama, why, why
This pain is unbearable
I no longer want to stay; but leave
The depth of pain is indescribable

I’m going to take my last breath now
And even though I suffered
I will be at peace; but not with you
I pray that forgiveness will be received

I forgive you Mama
I forgive you Papa
And when, through the years
You remember
And through the tears
You’ll shed
Please tell your family and friends
I was never, ever a blob

© 2019 Liana Wendy Howarth

Posted in Christianity, Healing, Inspiration, Songs, The Beauty of Creation, Trials & Blessings

THIS IS MY TAPESTRY (Song Lyrics)

background with flower and butterfly

Chorus
Every day I sow upon the tapestry of my life
Some days the view is clear
Some days confusion reigns
I have a choice which vision will be revealed
O Lord, help me to see, Your plan for me, unfold

When clouds of grey are looming
When darkness overwhelms
The colours of my rainbow
Are lost in twisted looms

The broken branches reach out
Cast shadows on my mind
No melody from sweet bird
No peace of any kind

As tears wash away joy’s light
I sow continually
So blind to reality
It’s not God’s plan for me

Underneath this tapestry
This tapestry of life
When I, to my flesh do sow
Will bring nothing but strife

Chorus
Every day I sow upon the tapestry of my life
Some days the view is clear
Some days confusion reigns
I have a choice which vision will be revealed
O Lord, help me to see, Your plan for me, unfold

Where is the beautiful side
Of this life given me
I must acknowledge His word
And sow more faithfully

By faith, sow to His Spirit
And let God’s palette flow
Across the landscape of time
Radiate with joy’s glow

I see now, this perfect side
Lord, the Son is shining
The shadows have been hidden
Our lives, now aligning

And the tree is now blooming
Branches healed, and restored
Scented blossoms overflow
Harmony’s notes record

Chorus
Every day I sow upon the tapestry of my life
Some days the view is clear
Some days confusion reigns
I have a choice which vision will be revealed
O Lord, help me to see, Your plan for me, unfold

© 2018 Liana Wendy Howarth

Posted in Christianity, Healing, Inspiration, Love, Photography, The Beauty of Creation

Today a Little Part of Me Flew Away

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Today a little part of me flew away
Tears
I’d been watching from a distance
Watching your mumma and papa
Lovingly build a safe place for you
Little by little the little nest grew
Upon a solid foundation, they took it in turns
Bringing perfect substance day by day
Until one day, your home was ready
I watched as they swooped our inquisitive kitten
Guarding over your delicate shells bearing life
As if your very life depended upon it
And it did
They sat upon you so faithfully
Smothering you with love
Then one day, life broke free
Little by little you grew
Into the sweetest little twins
And mumma and papa loved you so much
I saw little open mouths, always fed
I saw gifts of creation, love and tenderness
Then you were all grown up, and sitting upon the edge
Day by day I watched and waited
Not wanting you to leave
I took this photo yesterday
I’m so pleased I did
Because today, you’re no longer there
I missed saying goodbye
Today you are gone
Today a little part of me flew away
Joy in tears
’Cause I know you are safe
And that which flew away
Has been replaced with a gentleness
Thankfulness and love for my Father, my heavenly Father

Mumma’s still hanging around though
Maybe your siblings are soon to arrive
And again, sweet life will bless both them
And me
As I see His beautiful hand of love
Reach out, just outside our bedroom door

© 2017 Liana Wendy Howarth